UPDATE: Our Glorious Hat Drops returned on Australia Day 2016 (Approximately 2AM UTC on 26th January).
September 22nd 2015
Gentlemen, we have been the victims of a most heinous crime! Since the great Sniper vs. Spy battle of 2009 mercenaries have been occasionally blessed with cosmetics that drop from seemingly thin-air (provided they paid to become 'premium' mercenaries!). However, without any warning, and with what must have been malicious intent (possibly on the part of Gray Mann), all cosmetics stopped dropping on the 12th March 2015. So many questions remain unanswered; how could we let this happen? Why didn't we get any kind of warning? Will we ever be blessed with hat drops again? Did Aliens take our hats?
Here is what we know:
So what do we do about this? For now, Toxins and dpi.erico (A Grizzled Veteran and a Mercenary respectively) have written to a TF2 administrator (alias Eric Smith) to see if they can come up with a plan to reinstate our glorious hat drops. We hope that our hat drops (ordained by divine right) can be returned to us posthaste.
For posterity, here is a list of all the cosmetics that were affected by Hatgate:
A Brush with Death, A Rather Festive Tree, A Whiff of the Old Brimstone, After Dark, Air Raider, Aladdin's Private Reserve, All-Father, Allbrero, Angel of Death, Anger, Antarctic Parka, Antlers, Apparatchik's Apparel, Apparition's Aspect, Archimedes, Argyle Ace, Armored Authority, Attendant, Au Courant Assassin, Aviator Assassin, Backbiter's Billycock, Backpack Broiler, Backwards Ballcap, Balloonicorn, Barnstormer, Baron von Havenaplane, Baronial Badge, Baseball Bill's Sports Shine, Bear Necessities, Bearded Bombardier, Beep Boy, Belgian Detective, Berliner's Bucket Helm, Big Chief, Big Country, Big Elfin Deal, Big Steel Jaw of Summer Fun, Bigg Mann on Campus, Bird-Man of Aberdeen, Birdcage, Birdman of Australiacatraz, Black Watch, Blighted Beak, Blizzard Breather, Bloke's Bucket Hat, Blood Banker, Bolshevik Biker, Bombing Run, Bone Dome, Bonedolier, Bonk Boy, Bonk Helm, Bootenkhamuns, Bootie Time, Borscht Belt, Boston Boom-Bringer, Brain Bucket, Brainiac Goggles, Brainiac Hairpiece, Brawling Buccaneer, Breakneck Baggies, Brigade Helm, Brim-Full Of Bullets, Brotherhood of Arms, Brown Bomber, Bruiser's Bandanna, Bubble Pipe, Buccaneer's Bicorne, Buckaroos Hat, Builder's Blueprints, Burning Bandana, Burning Bongos, Business Casual, Cadaver's Cranium, Caffeine Cooler, Camera Beard, Capo's Capper, Captain's Cocktails, Caribbean Conqueror, Carouser's Capotain, Champ Stamp, Charmer's Chapeau, Chieftain's Challenge, Chronomancer, Chronoscarf, Chucklenuts, Clan Pride, Classified Coif, Cloud Crasher, Cobber Chameleon, Coffin Kit, Cold Killer, Colonial Clogs, Combustible Kabuto, Company Man, Compatriot, Conjurer's Cowl, Connoisseur's Cap, Conquistador, Cool Breeze, Cool Cat Cardigan, Copper's Hard Top, Cosa Nostra Cap, Cotton Head, Counterfeit Billycock, Coupe D'isaster, Couvre Corner, Cremator's Conscience, Criminal Cloak, Crocleather Slouch, Crocodile Smile, Crone's Dome, Crown of the Old Kingdom, Cuban Bristle Crisis, Cut Throat Concierge, Danger, Dark Age Defender, Das Fantzipantzen, Das Feelinbeterbager, Das Gutenkutteharen, Das Hazmattenhatten, Das Maddendoktor, Das Metalmeatencasen, Das Naggenvatcher, Das Ubersternmann, Detective Noir, Dead Cone, Dead of Night, Defiant Spartan, Delinquent's Down Vest, Der Wintermantel, Desert Marauder, Deus Specs, Dictator, Digit Divulger, Dillinger's Duffel, Doc's Holiday, Doctor's Sack, Dogfighter, Dr's Dapper Topper, Dr. Whoa, Dragonborn Helmet, Dread Hiding Hood, Dread Knot, Dry Gulch Gulp, Egghead's Overalls, El Jefe, El Muchacho, Employee of the Mmmph, Endothermic Exowear, Engineer's Cap, Escapist, Executioner, Exorcizor, Exquisite Rack, Extra Layer, Eye-Catcher, Face Full of Festive, Falconer, Familiar Fez, Fancy Dress Uniform, Fast Learner, Fed-Fightin' Fedora, Federal Casemaker, Five-Month Shadow, Flair!, Flamboyant Flamenco, Flapjack, Flared Frontiersman, Flipped Trilby, Founding Father, Frenchman's Beret, Frenchman's Formals, Frickin' Sweet Ninja Hood, Front Runner, Frontier Djustice, Fruit Shoot, Frymaster, Furious Fukaamigasa, Gabe Glasses, Gaelic Garb, Gaelic Golf Bag, Gas Guzzler, Geisha Boy, Gentleman's Gatsby, Gentleman's Ushanka, German Gonzila, Gilded Guard, Glasgow Great Helm, Glengarry Bonnet, Gold Digger, Golden Garment, Googly Gazer, Graybanns, Greased Lightning, Grenadier's Softcap, Grimm Hatte, Gym Rat, Half-Pipe Hurdler, Handyman's Handle, Hard Counter, Harmburg, Hat of Cards, Hat With No Name, HazMat Headcase, Head Warmer, Heavy Duty Rag, Heavy's Hockey Hair, Heavy-Weight Champ, Helmet Without a Home, Hermes, Hetman's Headpiece, Highland High Heels, Hive Minder, Honcho's Headgear, Hong Kong Cone, Hornblower, Horrific Headsplitter, Hot Dogger, Hotrod, Hottie's Hoodie, Hound Dog, Human Cannonball, Hurt Locher, Hustler's Hallmark, Idea Tube, Industrial Festivizer, Infernal Impaler, Infernal Orchestrina, Itsy Bitsy Spyer, Janissary Ketche, Jingle Belt, Joe-on-the-Go, Jumper's Jeepcap, Jungle Booty, Katyusha, Killer Exclusive, Killer's Kabuto, Kiss King, Koala Compact, Kringle Collection, L'homme Burglerre, L'Inspecteur, Large Luchadore, Larrikin Robin, Last Breath, Le Party Phantom, Level Three Chin, Li'l Snaggletooth, Lieutenant Bites, Liquidator's Lid, Liquor Locker, Little Bear, Little Buddy, Little Drummer Mann, Lonesome Loafers, Lord Cockswain's Novelty Mutton Chops and Pipe, Lord Cockswain's Pith Helmet, Lucky Shot, Lunatic's Leathers, Macho Mann, Madame Dixie, Made Man, Magistrate's Mullet, Magnificent Mongolian, Mair Mask, Man in Slacks, Mann of Reason, Mann of the House, Marshall's Mutton Chops, Marxman, Master's Yellow Belt, Medi-Mask, Medic's Mountain Cap, Medical Mystery, Medicine Manpurse, Merc's Mohawk, Merc's Muffler, Milkman, Minnesota Slick, Modest Pile of Hat, Moonman Backpack, Mutton Mann, Nanobalaclava, Napper's Respite, Neckwear Headwear, Nine-Pipe Problem, Noble Amassment of Hats, Noh Mercy, Nunhood, Officer's Ushanka, Ol' Geezer, Ol' Snaggletooth, Old Guadalajara, One-Man Army, Orion's Belt, Ornament Armament, Otolaryngologist's Mirror, Outback Intellectual, Outdoorsman, Paisley Pro, Pampered Pyro, Pardner's Pompadour, Peacenik's Ponytail, Pencil Pusher, Photo Badge, Physician's Procedure Mask, Pip-Boy, Pirate Bandana, Pocket Medic, Pocket Purrer, Pocket Pyro, Pocket Raiders, Polar Pullover, Pom-Pommed Provocateur, Pomade Prince, Pop-eyes, Powdered Practitioner, Prairie Heel Biters, Prancer's Pride, Prince Tavish's Crown, Private Eye, Professional's Panama, Professor's Peculiarity, Pugilist's Protector, Purity Fist, Pyromancer's Mask, Pyrotechnic Tote, Razor Cut, Rebel Rouser, Red Army Robin, Red Socks, Reggaelator, Reindoonicorn, Respectless Rubber Glove, Ritzy Rick's Hair Fixative, Rogue's Brogues, Rogue's Col Roule, Rogue's Robe, Ruffled Ruprecht, Rump-o'-Lantern, Safe'n'Sound, Salty Dog, Samur-Eye, Sandvich Safe, Scarecrow, Scoper's Smoke, Scotch Bonnet, Scotsman's Stove Pipe, Scout Shako, Security Shades, Seeing Double, Sengoku Scorcher, Sergeant's Drill Hat, Shogun's Shoulder Guard, Shooter's Sola Topi, Sight for Sore Eyes, Sir Hootsalot, Six Pack Abs, Sky Captain, Slick Cut, Slo-Poke, Smoking Skid Lid, Snapped Pupil, Sneaky Spats of Sneaking, Snow Scoper, Sober Stuntman, Soldier's Slope Scopers, Soldier's Stogie, Soot Suit, Southie Shinobi, Soviet Gentleman, Special Eyes, Spectre's Spectacles, Spook Specs, Spooky Shoes, Spooky Sleeves, Stainless Pot, Stately Steel Toe, Stereoscopic Shades, Stocking Stuffer, Stormin' Norman, Stout Shako, Sub Zero Suit, Sultan's Ceremonial, Surgeon's Side Satchel, Surgeon's Stahlhelm, Surgeon's Stethoscope, Swagman's Swatter, Tam O' Shanter, Tartan Spartan, Tartan Tyrolean, Tavish DeGroot Experience, Team Captain, Teddy Roosebelt, Teufort Tooth Kicker, Texas Half-Pants, Texas Slim's Dome Shine, Texas Ten Gallon, Tiny Timber, Tipped Lid, Tippler's Tricorne, Tomb Readers, Tools of the Trade, Toss-Proof Towel, Tough Guy's Toque, Tough Stuff Muffs, Towering Pillar of Hats, Toy Soldier, Toy Tailor, Track Terrorizer, Trail-Blazer, Trash Toter, Triad Trinket, Triboniophorus Tyrannus, Trickster's Turnout Gear, Triggerman's Tacticals, Troublemaker's Tossle Cap, Tsarboosh, Tuxxy, Tyrant's Helm, Tyurtlenek, Valley Forge, Viking Braider, Villain's Veil, Vintage Merryweather, Vintage Tyrolean, Virtual Reality Headset, Virtual Viewfinder, Vive La France, Voodoo JuJu (Slight Return), War Pig, Ward, Waxy Wayfinder, Weight Room Warmer, Well-Rounded Rifleman, Western Wear, Wet Works, Whirly Warrior, Whiskered Gentleman, Whiskey Bib, Whoopee Cap, Wingstick, Winter Wonderland Wrap, Wraith Wrap, Ye Olde Baker Boy, Your Worst Nightmare, Yuri's Revenge, Ze Ubermensch, Ze Goggles
Hat drops were suspended for 45 weeks, 4 days, 4 hours, 39 minutes, 46 seconds